No, I am not proud of my beginnings. But at the same time, I'm not afraid to share them. We were all newbies at one time. I, too, made my fair share of blunders: too many OFF's, intoducing other special powers, etc. Note that what I posted back then did not completely comply with the FAQ's as they were at the time. In 1994, the FAQ's were still being refined and many characters did not fit within the mythos--we had a raccoon, a dragon, werewolves, a troll, and a witch among other things. Being a clueless newbie, I assumed that meant mine did not need to completely fall within the FAQ's either. So sit-back and laugh at the absurdness of my beginnings and see how much I have changed since the week that started on August 11, 1994 when I first posted. I even had General LonGears bantering with me by the end of that first week! So new writers, rest assured, even if you aren't a good writer now, you will improve with perseverance.
Originally posted 11-18 August, 1994.
© 1994, 1997 by Scott Bernier
HTML-ized by Scott Bernier 24 September, 1997.
Return to Moxie's Stories page.
Hi folks.....no not a lurker, our site just got a.devilbunnies a couple of weeks ago. In real life I'm a busy grad student....just another face in the 25,000+ crowd at Texas Tech. I shall contribute as I can. Count me in on the FUDD cause....there are too many jack(devil)bunnies down here and they're always getting undertire. Guess it helps to drive a land yaht (3,000 lb chevy impala). Not worried about retaliation--every- one runs bunnies over down here. ______FUDD TIGHTLINK ON_________ There must be secret FUDD operations down here....Someone released a chemical weapon of some type back in April of 1993 that wiped-out 90% of the bunnies on and near the Tech campus. ______FUDD TIGHTLINK OFF________ Char--Moxie Man (Aldin Busheytail) Race:Human (former squirrel--see upcoming backgroud story) Alignment: FUDD Average college student of French and Native American bloodlines, turned to the way of the FUDD after coming across alt.devilbunnies on the internet (and a dream journey which pointed him on the path to his true destiny). Until he recieves formal training in FUDD ways, he shall continue acting like all other college students in the West Texas Area--run over all animals (especially jackrabbits) with his vehicle--a 1982 Chevy Impala class cargo/personel transport land yaht. Moxie Man is a yankee amoung southerners, but does not stick-out too bad, since about half of Lubbock's residents are yankees or aliens or worse. Moxie Man (or Eugene Pomerleau) preferes his nickname over his real name. Nicknamed derived from the unique non-alcoholic softdrink he chugs that originated in his home state of Maine. Moxie also stands for vigor or "full of nerve", which was derived from said soft drink which started as a nerve and hair tonic. For more info, wait for upcoming background story. Until I have another moment.... _____________ A Yankee (Mainah) stranded in West Texas Scott "Moxie Man" Bernier INTERNET: m8sab@ttacs.ttu.edu "Someone once said if he owned hell and Texas, he'd live in hell and rent out Texas."--Bella English of the Boston Globe
The summer of 1984 deep in the Northern Maine wilderness at an unnamed (yet) secret underground devilbunny lab/warren.....
An old grey furred db awaits the arrive of the prisioner who attempted to lead a rebellion of the squirrel slaves at the lab/warren. The old buck is missing one front buck tooth and his right ear is mangled.
Two dbguardtypes drag in a yound grey squirrel in chains and throw him on the ground near the old buck's feet. The guards then leave.
FlopEar: So, your the fool who thought a rebellion could succeed here.
Aldin Busheytail: It would have...if it weren't for that traitor. When I get my claws on Wiskers....
FlopEar: Not likely considering what I'm going to do to you. I'm not going to kill you, that would be to easy and make a marter of you.
Aldin: So you do fear us and our true cuteness...more cute than you and your fellow bunnies shall ever be able to be...true cuteness is more than eyes expression and an adorable face....it's in the tail (defiantflickofbusheytail).
FlopEar: I know, that's why your copatriots are going to the labs instead of back to the mines, of course the labs are where you started isn't it. We'll study them and find ways around your tails, we'll find ways to make humans adore us more than you. But, I need their cooperation....
Aldin: Right, squirrels cooperate with you! HA! We made that mistake once and you thanked us by enslaving us. What makes you think they'll cooperate anymore now!(moretailflicking)
FlopEar: I shall use you as an example to others of what we do to those who don't cooperate. It shall be very convincing. Guards! (the two dbguards comein) Take the prisioner to the great hall, make sure all the slaves and devilbunnies alike are there. Believe me Aldin, before I'm finished with you, you'll wish you died.
Aldin: You haven't heard the last of me, I swear, I'll be your death! (guards drag the squirrel away)
An hour later in the great meeting hall of the warren.....
Near the front of the hall is a raised platform, upon which stand FlopEar, and the two guards. Aldin is stretched-out on his back on a table and is bounded.
FlopEar: Fellow Devilbunnies, squirrel slaves, behold the leader of the recent rebellion, Aldin Bushtail. Let him be an example to those squirrels who disobey us in the future. For his trechory, he shall lose that which your kind seem to revere more than your genitals....he shall lose his TAIL. (gasps from several of the slaves. Aldin struggles but the bindings hold tight. Even his tail is bound.)
FlopEar points to one of the guards who takes his bunnyblade sword and lops off the squirrel's tail. Aldin lets off a short earpiercing squirrel scream before falling unconsious.
FlopEar: He shall now be taken to the labs where we shall try morphing experiments on him. Unless you wish to follow your former leaders footsteps, do as WE SAY. As a reminder, Aldin's Tail shall be nailed to the entrance of the mineshaft where the foiled rebellion started. Any future rebellion shall be punished in the same way. Dismissed!
Moxie Man m8sab@ttacs.ttu.edu
***db.off*** If you haven't read part one yet, you should do so first...DUH! ***db.on****
Somewhere in a secret devilbunny lab deep in the Maine Wilderness.... about two months later....
How much longer can I hold out, Aldin Busheytail(less) thought to himself. They've subjected me to such torture. Yes, FlopEar has kept his word...he hasn't killed me, yet. But, how much more can I take? They've destroyed almost everything that defines me as squirrel--first my tail (wince) then that strange liquid which destroyed my claws. That otherstuff which bleached my fur and made my paws sore. I can't take anymore. Spirit of the Wilderness, please, let me rest....
In walks FlopEar with a couple of dbtechtypes.
FlopEar: Good evening, Aldin (deviouseartwitch). Have I've got a surprise for you....Guards, bring him in! (The guards drag in a human boy of approx 14 years of age.)
Kid: Hey, watch what ya doing! This has got to be a bad dream--monster rabbits with guns who speak English. (tries to struggle against their grip) Oh! Not so hard, dude. What the hell ya want with me anyway!
FlopEar:(To Kid) You were setting snares too close to our operation. We'll have to terminate you. But first a little fun.....Strap him down! (To Aldin) I've been trying to think of an incredible way to repay you for your little rebellion a while back and your defiance since. No matter what we have done to you, you haven't cried-out or fought back...Now, what fun is that?
Aldin: You know I refuse to give you the pleasure of gloating.(Big cute eyes ala Skippy Squirrel on Animaniacs) Cuteness has carried me through.
FlopEar: Oh, but I will gloat. I've finally found a way to make you cringe and scream more than that day I had your tail removed. You see that brat over there. As you know humans represent most of what is uncute and uncool. Even amoung his own kind he's unpopular. Tonight, you and he are going to become a part of devilbunny history. If we're successful, it'll be the first step towards greater weapons of disguise for my fellow devilbunnies. Your name shall be remembered as a hero to devilbunnies everywhere. After tonight, you shall no longer be cute. You're going to take that human's place in his world!
Aldin: (Laughing) Now, how are you going to do something like that? He's an ugly human, I'm a squirrel, how are you going to fool other humans with that? Methinks your plan hath holes.
FlopEar:(anotherdevioustwitch) You haven't heard how yet...with our experimental bunnyclone system (tm?) we're going to use his DNA as a template and alter yours to match his. YOU WILL BE AN UNCUTE HUMAN BEFORE MORNING!!!
Aldin: (halfdoubtinghalfbelieving) Your insane....
FlopEar: Let's see how insane I am...Strap Tailless here to the other table and bring the probes in!
The two techs unchain Aldin from his holding pen and strap him on a table. They then set several bunnyprobes (tm?) around the scared kid.
Kid: What...what are you doing?
FlopEar: Nothing much...we're going to turn that squirrel into your look alike, give him a copy of your memories, and then... we'll problably chop you up into vienna sausage.(matteroffacttwitch?)
Kid: (scared) Your kidding, right?
FlopEar: Yah, we wouldn't chop you up into vienna sausage, we'll just chop you into spam or maybe treat depending on your behavior.
Kid: HHHEEELLLPPP!!!!! Get me out of this f@@king Dream! Come on Jim, I talk in my sleep, wake-up and wake me up, I can't take it anymore....(The kid continues to rant and struggle until one of the techs knocks him out with a large club.)
FlopEar: Proceed with the experiment.
(put in fancy light show here as beems of light go out from the probes and scan over the kid's body the probes then point toward Aldin and shower over his body in a differant color.)
Aldin (inpurescreamsofsquirrelpain) AARRGHHH, I'll get you for this Flop...(falls unconsius)
The squirrel's body begins to enlarge, the fur sheds off, forepaws morph into pink hands with opposing thumbs, the hind legs straightenout and lengthen. Facially the entire face metamorphs from squirrel features to human features. Squirrel teeth fallout to be replaced by human ones.
DBTECH ONE: Stage one complete, appears successful. Shall we proceed with stage two?
FlopEar: (deviouswiggle) Proceed, initiate bunnybrainwave copy (tm?)...
(insert cheap Star Trek Original series prop here)
Silver bowl with sticks and wires stickingout of it is placed over the
kid's and clone's head. After 30 minutes of humming, the bowls are
removed.
FlopEar: Now we wait for them to come too....
An hour later
Aldin (awakens slowly and growns): Ugh, my stomach feels worse than that time I swollowed those fermented twizzler sticks....(looks around as much as he can in his restraints sees his furless body)..no, bad dream, they couldn't have done it. (Suddenly, he feels the alien memories of the Kid flash in his mind) NNNNNOOOOO! Bad dream, wake me up! (regains himself)
FlopEar (observing all this): Aldin, look in the mirror I have provided... I'm gloating!
Aldin (looks in the mirror): NNNNOOOOO!!!!! It's all a illusion. You couldn't have pulled it off. When I recover from whatever drug you've pumped me up on things will be back to normal....
FlopEar: Don't disbelieve, Aldin...who are you? Aldin the Squirrel or Eugene Pomerleau?
Aldin suddenly realizes that he responds to both names and he has been speaking in the human's language and not his own and that FlopEar seems to be able to communicate in both. Probing his mind he suddenly sees too differant lives, his own and the lonely one of the human called Eugene. FlopEar was right, this kid was unliked by his own kind.
FlopEar: What do you think know? As soon as we purge your mind of your true squirrel memories, we'll send you back on your way that brat's, excuse me, your boy scout troop camping down by the lake. You'll be back before you are missed and even you won't remember your trip here. As for the other squirrels missing you, don't worry, they got to watch, that is forced to watch, the wholething on the bunnymonitors (tm). This should melt any resistance left in them.
Aldin: I'll get you for this!
FlopEar: Save your empty threats. You won't be coming back and I've kept my word. I always keep my word. (to tech) Blank him, have a detail bring back to his tent and then send the real kid to the kitchen, I haven't had human in months.... (to Aldin) Farwell, Aldin, excuse me, Eugene, we shall not see each other again.
Before Aldin can retort, the tech turns on the the bunnybrainwave copy (tm) in blank mode and the squirrel-turned-human falls unconsious.
***alt.db off**** A little late, here's part three and not the last...sorry....Moxie Man ***Alt.db on*****
"Huh?....", Eugene awoke with a start. He notes that he is covered with a cold sweat. "Joe?" It dawns on him that Joe was sleeping in a differant tent this night. Obviously, he just had a nightmare, but could not recall any portions of it. Where was he....that's right, on the south shore of Namakata Lake on the Appalachian Trail deep in Maine's Wilderness. A leader had injured his back the previous day, the scout troop had decided to turn back from there 50 mile backpacking trip to carry the injured leader out. They would be on the trail two more days.....Yet, things didn't seem quite right. But, Eugene couldn't quite tell why. Tiredness overcame him and he dozed back to sleep.
Two days later, the group was on their way back to China, Maine. Yet, the whole time, Eugene felt uneasy..like he was being watched. One of his few good friends in the troop, Joe, told him it was just probably the fact they've been away from civilization so long. Eugene accepted this dispite the fact that he had felt this way since that night on Namakata Lake.
As the rest of the year went by, this uneasiness diminished, but still remained in the background. The dreams didn't help...they were like fragments of some terrible class B horror flicks, that Eugene couldn't stand. They always involved this strangly odd, yet familar talking giant rabbit with one bent ear, who would do these wacked-out experiments on him. Eugene always woke up as the pain caused by these experiments began. They occured at regular 7-10 day intervals, yet never seemed to be the same. He never told his folks about it, Eugene was unpopular enough in school without having to deal with being teased about seeing a shrink. He got use to the dreams and pushed them aside. They eventually stopped alltogether except for when he experienced a lot of stress.
The years went by, and Eugene excelled in school, especially in the math and sciences. He made Eagle Scout in his scout troop. Yet, he felt there was something not quite right in the world around him. He seemed to notice this more when he was in the woods alone, away from other people. The stresses of human life were getting on him and he yearned for another way...he envied the creatures of the forest, for he felt they had an easier life than a teenager. He found one thing strange as he would walk in the woods--he seemed to prefere observing any animal with a bushy tail over those with other kinds of tails. His scouting skills taught him how to approach and observe the wilderness creatures without disturbing them. He had even snuck-up on a skunk once without becoming a victim to its pungent musk. Yet, for some reason he was attracted to squirrels the most. It almost seemed like he could understand the wigglings of their tails and their chattering up in the tree branches.
It was on one such trip to one of his favorite spots in the wilderness that Eugene was surprised one day. As he walked down this particular trail leading to an abandon farm some 5 miles from his home, that a stranger walked-out from around a tree by the trail. This stranger was a 6 foot tall male Native American who called to Eugene by name.
"Eugene, do not be afraid. I am John Clouddrifter of the Micmacs. Though your blood has been diluted and tainted with white blood, you are still a part of our tribe. I have been sent to find you. It is customary among our people to seek-out those with our blood as they approach their 16th year. And help guide them along their destiny. It is also our custom to allow you some time to ponder whether or not you wish to except your heritage and to consider exceptance of our help or not."
"John Clouddrifter", Eugene replied,"How long have you been following me before approaching me. How did you know my name. What Micmac tribe? I've heard of the Passamaquodies and the Penobscots, but not the Micmacs."
"Eugene, our tribe has monitored your family since your great-grandmother moved away from the Northern Maine Lumbering camps at the turn of the century. Both your grandmother and mother declined our offers. We hope you will be differant. The Micmacs do not hold land in the US. Our tribal land is in New Brunswick. If you do not believe me, ask your mother about your heritage. I'll be back here in one week to await your answer."
Clouddrifter stepped back around the tree. Eugene went up to the tree he had stepped behind, but he was no longer there, there was no trace that any other human had been there..no footprints and no broaken branches in the underbrush.
Eugene proceeded home and learned of his geneological background. He learned that what Clouddrifter had said was true, but his mother had no more info than stating that his great-grandmother had been full indian. He researched the subject at the libraries and found that the Micmac did hold land in New Brunswick near the Maine boarder and lived mostly as farmers. They had not yet embraced the gambling casino as a money-maker as other tribes had. He had made his dission, he would risk trusting Clouddrifter.
On the appointed day, he met John Clouddrifter in the same place in the woods were they had met a week earlier. After indicating his acceptance on learning more about his heritage and the other help the Micmac offered, Clouddrifter led Eugene down a trail that Eugene swore wasn't there before. After an hour's hike, they came upon a small clearing.
"This is sacred ground," Clouddrifter said. "It was used by the Norridgewock and Abnaki for ceremonies. Both were sister tribes to the Micmac. We are no longer in your town of China, but deep in the wilderness near the Canadian border. You will learn someday how we were able to get here, but that is no matter for today. Today, you shall begin your studies. If they fair well with you we shall do this again during the next full moon and so on until you are ready for the Journey."
"What Journey would that be?" Eugene asked.
"The Journey into the spirit world that all Micmac have taken before you to seek out your destiney...you're purpose in life."
"So be it."
***alt.db off**** I promise this is it. the final part....honest! Moxie Man ***alt.db on*****
Three full cycles of the moon passed. And Clouddrifter announced it was time for the Jouney. "I can lead you in and take you out, but what happens there is all up to you."
At first Eugene was in that clearing in the forest sitting with Cloddrifter next to a small fire. Next he knew, he was on a mountainside overlooking a familar looking lake. It occurs to him that he is is back on the Appalachian Trail near Namakata Lake. Suddenly a giant grey squirrel appears in front of him and speaks.
"You who masquarades as human, I am a relative of yours. My name does not matter. YOU ARE NOT EUGENE POMERLEAU."
"Then who am I?", Eugene replied.
"This is not the time for you to learn," the squirrel replied. "However, I will teach you this now....look, look deep into another being's eyes and you shall see who they really are and not what they claim to be with false facades. Though you are not Eugene Pomerleau, continue using this name, it will conceal you from those who wish you harm. Weather lore is in your blood, seek it out. While doing so, you will discover others who shall reveal more to you."
Before, Eugene could reply, the squirrel scampered off into the trees. It is then that he notices that the trees were gigantic. Before he can explore further though, he finds himself back in the clearing with Clouddrifter.
"My time with you is finished." Clouddrifter said, "Go and act upon what you have learned."
Next thing he knew, Eugene was back at the trailhead near his parents' home. Clouddrifter was not to be found. He recalled the squirrel's words of wisdom and acted upon them, though he didn't understand the part about the eyes, until his senior year in high school.
He was working the late shift as the lane attendent at a bowling lane in a nearby city. He was good friends with the mechanic there and had offered him a ride home that night. In the parking lot they were harrassed by a couple of drunk customers who had been kicked out earlier in the evening. Eugene looked at one of them in the eyes. Instead of seeing a human affected by alcohol, he saw a brown and grey rabbit with large claws and incredibly sharp teeth.
"What the!!!???" Eugene gasped, "Doug, we must leave. We've gotta leave NOW!"
"What are you talking about?" Doug said, "If they want to fight, we'll fight them."
"No, we must go!", Eugene exclaimed, grabbing Doug by the arm and pulled him towards the car. The drunk Eugene saw through pulled a gun and shot at them, only to hit the back bumper of the vehicle.
"Shit, how did you know?", Doug exclaimed as Eugene floored it out of the parking lot.
"Something I was taught at one time....shit, they're following us. I'll try to lose'em."
For the next 40 minutes they were chased by the drunks through the empty streets of the city. It didn't matter what traffic violations he pulled, Eugene couldn't lose them or attract a cop. Where were all the cops?
"Pull in over there! There at that Dunkin Donuts!" Doug exclaimed.
Eugene did so. The drunks followed slaming into a police cruiser in the parking lot. Eugene then floored his vehicle out of there. He never saw those two drunks again.
Four more years pass. Eugene was now a junior majoring in Meteorology at a University of NH school in the White Mountain National Forest. He has finally found acceptance amoung his peers dispite his refusal to drink alcohol. He experimented as a frosh like everyone else only to find he couldn't handle it. They accepted him anyway--he was the designated driver. No one called him Eugene. They called him Gene, or Moxie Man, after his drink of choice...Moxie: A strange soft drink invented some 110 years before by a Maine doctor as a nerve/hair tonic. Most people couldn't stand the stuff simply because it had an attitude--that is it bit back at the back of the throat as it went down. Gene loved it, it gave almost the same tingling thrill as alcohol without the side effects.
Yet, with his new found popularity, Gene, felt unsure with himself. The dreams he thought he outgrew eight years before were coming back and coming back in full force. He could no longer push aside the images of that laughing rabbit, nore could he wake-up as the torture began. He knew it was foolish, all a dream and such, but he really hated that rabbit, yearning to be able to take a shotgun into the dream sequence and put the bastard out of its misery. He still kept the dreams secret for fear of losing his new found friends.
But there was one other dream differant from all the rest. In it he is a squirrel watching from a tree as two humans poach a deer, but are then punished by a hodgepodge creature which calls itself The Spirit of the Wilderness. This 10 foot tall creature which seemed to have the head, torso, and forepaws of a black bear, a rack of deer antelers, the hind quarters of a bobcat, an enlarged blackish squirrel's tail to match the creature's size, and a giant pair of wings of an eagle upon its back was imune to the human's gunfire. It punished the poachers by field dressing them as they would have done to the deer. Gene, found the dream disturbing, not because of the violence, but because in the dream, he cheered the Spirit of the Wilderness on by chanting "Death to the Humans!".
Two more years pass, Moxie Man (he gave up using his real name except for legal purposes--even his proffessors called him, Moxie) is now pursuing graduate studies in the Atmospheric Sciences in Lubbock, TX. It is now 1993 on his college campus, Moxie notes that there seemed to be a lot of jackrabbits. He didn't like them, they reminded him too much off that rabbit in his dreams which had called itself FlopEar. He was overjoyed to see almost all of them dead one day in April...it was in the news, "Jackrabbits die mysteriously near Tech Campus, news at 10." Yet, the cause was never determined. By the following spring, under the stress of classwork, Moxie turned to the Internet to escape from reality. There he found alt.devilbunnies. Thinking it was total bull, he contacted the BHX at NoCo. Within days, he signed up for the Army of FUDD. "If I can't kill'em in my dreams, I shall kill them for real," Moxie said.
From the Moxie Man: I now know that those two drunks (well at least the one I looked in the eyes) I encountered that night in 1988 at the bowling alley were devilbunnies. At that time I didn't know about the FUDD cause, why were they after me? No matter between that incident and the dreams, my mind is made-up. The devilbunnies are the Third Anti-Christ. If we don't stop them, the end of the world shall be at hand.
Death to the Bunnies!
Moxie Man
Driving down busy 19th Street in Lubbock today, when this big jackrabbit jumped in my way. My options--run it over or let the Texaco Tanker behind me run me over--I chose the former. I know it had to be a db...dang thing got its final revenge as I hit it...it bit into and punctured my tire! It's gonna cost me $60- to replace that Goodyear--the db's teeth were still in it--thus I couldn't claim my road hazard policy--seems that running over animals is not covered--the mechanic was probably a bunny lover....
Moxie Man
_____Tightlink to BHX at NoCo_______________
I don't have your encryption device yet...no matter, the bunnies will soon know about this too....Some of the Jackrabbits attempted to ambush me on my afternoon break today. I was walking out the door of the science building at Tech, but did not note the 10-12 rabbits waiting outside the door until after it closed. Two leaped at me. I was carrying a can of my favorite drink, Moxie, which I dropped out of reaction to the attack. Moxie is highly carbonated, making it vary volitile, but I didn't think the can would explode like it did. In the confusion, I was able to leap back in the building. That's when I saw the smoke...what a stench!!!! When the smoke cleared, there were these two puddles of goo, one with a bunny ear sticking out of it where the Moxie had blown. Dang stuff melted the two assailants! Now I know why others warned me about drinking too much of it at once. One of the other rabbits approached the goo cautiously, sniffed it and ran. The others followed suit. I don't know all the ingredients in Moxie, but Holy Vanilla Extract is _not_ one of them. When I come up for training, I'll bring some for your scientists to examine in the lab. I think I'm going to go get myself a "SuperSoaker" and fill it with Moxie in the meantime....My guess is the attack was in retaliation for the bun I ran-over the other day....how they identified me in this large crowd so quickly is beyond me....
Moxie Man
_______end tightbeam__________
Somewhere at a secret bunny lab in the Maine wilderness some ten years ago......
A young grey squirrel was working on an experiment when an elder white and black bunny hopped in.
Rabbit: I'm going to miss you dispite you being a squirrel. Your one of the best workers I've had...wish I could take you with me...I tried, but the higher-ups want you here.
Busheytail: You're being transfered? Who's taking over....
Rabbit: A grey buck by the name of FlopEar. Been through many battles with the humans. Central command thinks he'd make a good buaracrat here, since he's got knowledge in human anatomy.
Busheytail: So where does that put me?
Rabbit: Don't know....hopefully, you'll keep your job here. If not, look me up...I'll see what I can do. I could never get over how you can look more cute with that tail of yours than any bun could hope to accomplish.
The bun left. Busheytail pondered....what will this new boss be like...I have gotten along well both career-wise and friend-wise with the Rabbit. Funny, I don't recall anyone calling him anything but that....So this FlopEar doesn't like humans either...hmmmm....perhaps I'll finally get some human subjects for the lab work....
Three days later FlopEar arrived and the Rabbit left. Things went well for two weeks until FlopEar started to think he was in charge of Busheytail's lab....seems he wanted the squirrel to experiment on "volunteers" which consisted of other squirrels and buns who crossed the new "commandant" Busheytail pushed too far and found himself no longer a lab technician and instead was now a slave in the mines....what was this stuff they were digging out which glowed in the dark? It made most of the other squirrels sick after a week or so, but not the Busheytail for he had done a few "harmless" experiments on himself before FlopEar had first arrived at the lab.
Several months passed....The squirrels (the non-sick ones anyway) had had it...they considered a rebellion.....
Huh....Moxie Man awoke with a start....who's this "Busheytail"? Am I this "Busheytail" and did I actually work for that f@@kin' FlopEar at one time on their side? Gotta be the worst and strangest dream yet.... yawn...he dozed back off....
Somewhere deep in the Maine Wilderness ten years ago....
They didn't dare plan out the revolt verbally, not even in the sleeping quarters for they were watched there by the buns also. They planned through that language only the squirrels knew--tailflickering. During mining shifts, there were ten squirrels but only one guard...shouldn't be too hard to take him out, have one of the squirrels fake illness, distract the guard and they would then have a weapon. Furthermore, Busheytail knew were a nearby weapon storage closet was...it shouldn't take too long after that to take over and capture FlopEar. Then things would be explained to the higher-ups and everyone could get back to the work they had been use to under the Rabbit.
On the appointed day, Busheytail gave the signal, Puffcheaks collapsed (he looked extremely cute in his faking), the guard came foward and they knocked him out. One of the squirrels raised his paw to give him the deathblow, but the Busheytail stopped him--"No, we don't need to shed anymore blood then necessary. The less blood, the easier it will be to explain to Central." They proceeded to the weapons locker. Strange, it was not guarded. (nervoustailflickerings) "I don't like this." One said, "It's too easy..." They proceeded up the next three levels without encountering anyone. "Something is wrong with this." The Busheytail said. They made it to the top level. There was outdoor light streaming in from an entrance ahead. "Abort the orignal plan--let's just get out of here and then once we are safe in the woods, we can better plan a counterattack to free our comrads." They proceeded towards the entrance...100 yards to go and the corridor suddennly errupted with bungunfire..."Take cover!" It seems they had been betrayed by one of their own, but they would not learn this until later.
The battle raged on for thirty minutes or more. For every bun killed, two more came to take its place. 3 squirrels made it out the door and into the open...whether they make it or not was not for the Busheytail to know....three of his friends layed dead on the ground, a forth dieing. Twenty buns layed dead or dieing in various parts of the corridor--the Busheytail had killed three himself. They had fought valiantly, but were now forced into surrendering or dieing. They took there chances with the former. The two survivors other than the Busheytail were taken back to the mines. As for the Busheytail, he was taken before FlopEar and sentence was pronounced....his tail would be removed....The guard stood overhim, lifted his bunsword and swung down....
AAARRRGGGHHH!!!!!!!! The Moxie Man awoke with a start and in a cold sweat. I can't take this anymore....these dreams are too real...no more Moxie before bedtime.....Yet, it seems so real....preposterous....perhaps there is such a thing as reincarnation...Nah, more like too many Steven King flicks and you're losing your mind....(he got up and went to the bathroom mirror) look at yourself, your even talking to your...(he is looking at himself in the mirror, deep within his own eyes and sees not a human but a tailless grey squirrel)...shit....can't be awake yet....I've looked at myself hundreds of time and seen Eugene stare back, not some tailless squirrel....go away ghost an let me rest.....
Somewhere deep in the Maine Wilderness some ten years back....
He'd been sent to the labs as a "subject" after they removed his tail. After about a week, they brought in another squirrel and showed him around... why that son of a...it was that traitor, Wiskers, who had sold them out and alerted FlopEar of the revolt. What's this...the traitor has volunteered to a deranged experiment in which the buns shall make him one of them? It'll never work--they haven't done enough background testing as I had warned them months ago....The bunnytechs stuck wires into the traitor and aimed this raygun at him...and the traitor was loving every step of it.... Blinding light...after 30 minutes of this the ray shuts down and in place of the squirrel is a cute little greyish rabbit (though no where as cute as the squirrel had been.) They help him off the table and towards a mirror. He twitches with joy like a real rabbit, then flops over on the floor and is still. "What happened?" one of the techs asked as the other peered over the still carcus with a handheld scanner. "The lungs didn't quite survive the change--they collapsed from the look of it...send him down to autopsy to make sure." The second tech then turns to Busheytail. "Well, Tailless, looks like we'll have to do it your way afterall, slow and meticulously. Hope ya like pain...." Thus ended the life of the traitor....and the beginning of the misary for the Busheytail.....fade out.
The Moxie Man half awoke and then dozed again....this time without any more dreams....