updated 10/26/02

Upcoming Gigs
Oh no! No shows!!! How will you survive? 

General News... It's Furry-Soft!
The Single... or Look Into the Vinyl, You Are Getting Very Sleepy
The newest 7" single, In a Peter Criss Mood, is so purty and green. Why I do declare... if I didn't know better I'd swear it was hypnotizing me.  But how could a little ol' piece of green vinyl do something like that? The urge to buy it does seem so powerful strong though. Why I don't think I can control myself.... it's calling me to join it. I must buy one.. no, two.. no, three...no!!! I must buy ten copies. After all, a house is just not a home without a copy of In a Peter Criss Mood.  It is beautiful to look at, pleasing to hear, and wonderful to own.  Nothing could bring more joy to the citizens of earth than a lovely, lovely vinyl 45 blessed by the saviors of trash rock, the Goats.

Sonny Bono... or the Seeds of Evil Have a Name and It Be Rocky Monroe
Folks, it's obvious that Heaven and Earth have collided.  If you haven't read the story of Peter's Angels, you damn well should, as new information has come to light, and can not be overlooked. The legacy just keeps growing and the stories get bigger and better. 

How We Beat the Evil Esperanto Demons ... or Why Bigfoot and Erik Estrada Do Not Equal a Good Time
The Goats seem to be on a hiatus. You could say we're one of those really cool 1970s tv shows, like Bigfoot and Wildboy, who don't know if they've been cancelled or not.  Or maybe we're one of those cheesy 1970s tv shows, like CHiPs, where Erik Estrada thinks he's gods gift to the universe - so he demands a new contract requiring: 

• more money 
• more girls
• more dressing room space
• one hundred clown cars
• a silo full of shriner hats 
• a big tub filled with blue yarn 
• a shirt made of chocolate milk
• a killer robot that causes untold amounts of hilarity and hijinx to ensue, especially in the freeze frame moments at the end of each show
• Larry Wilcox in the background with a bag over his head while "Ponch" does dramatic, spotlighted soliloquies
• Captain Getraer with an eye patch, pirate hat, earring, and obviously drawn on beard stubble, starting every police briefing with the phrase "arrrrrrr... avast ye mateys... where be me pantaloons, ye landlubbers!!"
• a well known and beloved catch phrase which is uttered a minimum of once per episode, his own suggested phrase being "hey man, furry-soft... Ponch says dig it!"
• that he be allowed to disco dance at least twice during every show while the rest of the cast stands around the dance floor looking suitably impressed at his polyester disco-wear and his incredible footwork, and that shots of the others being suitably impressed with his dancing are interspersed with slo-motion closeups of his shiny, white disco boots and shiny white teeth.
• that all promotional material for the show compare his acting abilities to Sir Laurence Olivier, and imply that Erik is the better actor.

Gil is still living on the other side of darkness.  He was last spotted by a crazed hunter, deep in the woods, and was reportedly chasing a large, matted creature, all the while screaming "Hey! Stop, Mr. Bigfoot! I come in peace!!"   This rumor leads credence to previously unsubstantiated rumors that he has been attempting to track Bigfoot sightings in the state of Maine, as well as petitioning the government to officially change his mailing address to "Parts Unknown".   

Tristan and Chris continue to immerse themselves in the glory and ineptness that is pop culture and bad movies. Only bad movies make the world go round... unfortunately you have to watch an awful lot of them to really find a gem. Mostly you just wish you could put your head in a vice and end the misery.  But never fear, Goats fans, the quest for the bad movie still goes on, and our heroes minds will continue to be suitably warped for your convenience. Newly purchased movies  with high hopes for enjoyment, hilarity, action, and hijinx include: 

• the fabulous Joe Don Baker vehicle, The Golden Needles (a big laugh was had by all upon hearing that someone had bought a copy of this movie when a friend had lied about the movie containing a fight to the death between Burgess Meredith and Ann Sothern) 
• Buck Rogers in the 25th Century (Buck has to stop a rock concert which is being broadcast all over the universe and is going to hypnotize the kids to commit mayhem! Heavens no!! Not that!!! Hey, they stole the plot to a Peter's Angels episode!)
• Kid Vengeance - how can you go wrong with a Jim Brown, Leif Garrett western from the seventies?
• numerous horror movies about stupid, unnaturally pretty teens who go into a) an insane asylum, b) a haunted house, c) a deserted mansion or church, d) some place they know damn well they just shouldn't be
• plus many, many more martial arts, horror, action, and seventies movies - so many movies, so little time...

In other ongoing news, Chris still believes Joe Don Baker is the coolest man alive!!..... while Tristan still insists that Chris is dead wrong.

Other Bands... or Buddy Cop Movies- Tristan and Steven Seagal vs Chris and Joe Don Baker 
While Gil chases "El Sasquatch", Tristan continues clubbing everyone over the head by playing drums with the incredible, edible Eggbot, the poor man's answer to the question "what do I do with this old typewriter, twenty rocks, and a pound of sawdust?"  

Tristan is also playing drums with Godbois, which should be pronounced "God boyz", but sadly is not.  This band is a cool three piece with Charlie fronting the band on keyboards, and Neil rounding out the group on the bass. 

And as if that ain't enough for ya, Tristan is sitting in on drums with the legendary and super cool band, the Pontiffs. You must see them when they play. The Pontiffs are everything that rock n roll should be.  I love the Pontiffs, and so should you.  In fact, I suggest we all live vicariously through them, thus making the world a better place to be.

Chris should be unleashing her new band on the unsuspecting public next year.  New songs are being written and the guitar is being played fast and furiously.  The band will be taking no prisoners, and loping the heads off of anyone who dares get in her way.  Rock n roll girls are go!

Check out the page dedicated to the newest single to find out the never before told story of Peter's Angels! Go Ahead On! back to main DAG page